When I was in high school I joined in our school paper not only because I could get to be with competitive student achievers but also because I could get to have fun while participating in campus journalism contests off campus. During inter-school contests, you only don’t get to know other students from other schools but you as well get to share your skills and talents with them. To sum it up, I love the glitz and glamour of being in the life of a campus journalist. So, my story starts in one of the campus journalism contests I have joined. I was in my junior years then and during that particular contest we had a chance to participate as many fields in journalism writing as we can. There I decided to go outside of the box and take a shot in joining other fields like in editorial, sports, and even in editorial cartooning! Haha… I am a news writer ever since I figured out what journalism means so I guess it was time for me to take a spin. And guess what? I won runner-up in editorial and champion (woot! woot!) in sportswriting! Though I love winning over new things, I sort of regret winning the top in sportwriting. You see, a dear co-club member of mine was very good in sports writing. In fact, he was our sports editor and he has won a dozen of awards in such since his elementary years. So, he was the one (and he really thought he was) favored to be the champion. But it turned out that he only placed second because I beat him as the champion.
So that really starts my story. After the contest, I got the chance to talk with him together with my other co-club members. We were rejoicing then because our school was the over-all champs in the secondary division (we really were that good hehe). While we were talking, he mentioned something that really bothered me. He said that it is better to not have a place or won 3rd and 4th or so on. What’s bad he said is to be placed on the second spot when you know that you are THAT CLOSE to winning. Yep, he really emphasized the THAT CLOSE. I knew that he was really upset that made him spill that comment. But I was caught off guard because I knew that he really wanted to let me know how bad he felt of me taking his crown. From then on, he influenced me to believe in the idea that being second place is worse than being third, fourth, or no place at all. It is not about what you would expect really. It is more on what would you feel after knowing that you had THAT CLOSE.
Now, in every aspect of my life as a student, whether if I joined something or simply in my academic life, I always make sure that I go for the gold—and never the silver nor the bronze. That is why I always feel some regrets if I ever placed second (in exams, in rankings, or in awards) when I know if I could have done a tiny bit better I could have made it to the top. Yes, I am that competitive. But sometimes, and actually most of the time, I would normally accept the fact that I am that close only. Take for example my situation of being top 2 of our batch for two consecutive academic standings already. For me, well it is a great honor to even reach that far but I must admit that I never liked the idea at first that I cannot make it as top 1 for two rounds now. Another great example is what I just had recently. I joined in an on-the-spot essay writing contest and being the associate-editor of the college paper, I was expected to take this contest as a piece of cake and eyes closed. But shoot I only placed second. Honestly, I at first really questioned myself if my skills are really enough to knock down those who don’t even give a damn in being in the college paper. I don’t hold grudges to those top 1’s because first it’s my fault not theirs and second, they are in fact truly awesome! It‘s just that being number two sucks! I never had that kind of mentality that oh well, shit happens so deal with it. Yes I deal with it, but I deal with it by conditioning myself that I won’t make the same mistake again and that I would reach for the best next time.
This idea for me is indeed very pessimistic but it taught me three things. First, mediocrity is not an option. You don’t do something for the sake of just doing it. It is human nature that no matter how much we questioned ourselves on something we always want to only receive the grand prize and not the consolation prizes. Second is in everything that you do, always do your best. I remember our school president in high school taught this to us. He said that yes we win, yes we fail, but it’s not winning or losing that matters because what matters most is that you did such in the maximum level of your potential and not just in your second spare. And third, it taught me that there will always be greater and lesser persons than you are. So, even though being number two is crap I guess that’s life. You are not always the winner. And you are not always the loser too. Sometimes, you also settle at the middle—whether too far or TOO CLOSE.
Now, you know why I am not a fan of number two’s…
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